Then you get into a relationship and feel your partner’s disappointment every day because it turns out that while you have gotten comfortable with how your brain works, the rest of the world hasn’t. But don’t worry; tomorrow is the day when it’ll all get better…
Went mask off early on, caught the heart of a neurotypical. A personality consists of more than dopamine effectiveness and sometimes the rest makes for what someone considers a compelling package.
And then the cycle repeats. You try to comfort a society holding on to neurotypical values. You haven’t learned to accept yourself. You keep working against your nature and you still hate yourself for failing.
That’s my point. Being at peace with yourself only works until you have to regularly deal with someone who isn’t. Of course you can isolate yourself from those people if they fail to adapt but that means you get to choose between being in a relationship and feeling tension over your neurodivergence on the one side and being alone but at peace with yourself on the other.
I’m not saying that you can’t make a satisfying choice but it certainly ain’t an easy one. If you get a partner who meshes well with your brain, congratulations. But a lot of people don’t.
Also, making a choice about your relationship means making a choice that affects two people (or more if you’re poly or have a dependent). And sometimes you can’t in good conscience end a relationship because you know that doing so will majorly screw over your partner.
Life is complicated. Inner peace is a precious and fragile good and sometimes you trade that good away. Appreciate it if and while you have it.
Then you get into a relationship and feel your partner’s disappointment every day because it turns out that while you have gotten comfortable with how your brain works, the rest of the world hasn’t. But don’t worry; tomorrow is the day when it’ll all get better…
Go mask off early on, get rejected by neurotypicals and find your self a nice manic pixie to settle down with.
Fingers crossed one of our daughters is good at accounting.
Went mask off early on, caught the heart of a neurotypical. A personality consists of more than dopamine effectiveness and sometimes the rest makes for what someone considers a compelling package.
And then the cycle repeats. You try to comfort a society holding on to neurotypical values. You haven’t learned to accept yourself. You keep working against your nature and you still hate yourself for failing.
That’s my point. Being at peace with yourself only works until you have to regularly deal with someone who isn’t. Of course you can isolate yourself from those people if they fail to adapt but that means you get to choose between being in a relationship and feeling tension over your neurodivergence on the one side and being alone but at peace with yourself on the other.
I’m not saying that you can’t make a satisfying choice but it certainly ain’t an easy one. If you get a partner who meshes well with your brain, congratulations. But a lot of people don’t.
Also, making a choice about your relationship means making a choice that affects two people (or more if you’re poly or have a dependent). And sometimes you can’t in good conscience end a relationship because you know that doing so will majorly screw over your partner.
Life is complicated. Inner peace is a precious and fragile good and sometimes you trade that good away. Appreciate it if and while you have it.