Often I end up closing the list and immediately turning to self-soothing. And because there’s no way to know in advance if a task on the list will give me anxiety, this often results in my list being not just unusable but unreadable, preventing me from doing or even remembering the non-anxiety tasks on the same list.
Are you on any medication? That makes a big difference for my anxiety.
You should limit how much of the list you can see and remove any items that can go on a calendar. Seeing a list of like twenty things I needed to do would be absolutely trigger my anxiety so I set appointments to do things so that I’m never looking at more than two or three tasks at once (I also have an awesome spouse who will drip feed me tasks that I need to do around the house).