I’m not sure there’s a correct answer to that, because the answer is technically yes, I think I’ve been inappropriate sometimes but also yes, I’ve been been told to stop sharing by several peers as an adult in several different settings, but not by anywhere near the number of peers I had.

Logically, it doesn’t make any sense to let a tiny percent outweigh the majority. It doesn’t feel nice, though.

e: tried to clarify

deleted by creator

Could you give them something that doesn’t harm the plants, that might lure them where they won’t bother you, and that won’t make the problem worse in a different way?

Maybe they’d like something you normally throw away in relatively small quantities that won’t attract something worse or poison anything?

e: disclaimer: IANAG. I am terrible with plants.

Kinda makes you rethink how we typically define ‘society’.

Like it’s far more fundamental than we think, and we very narrowly define it by too complex criteria. And we’re too invested in making sure that definition stays narrow enough that we can justify harming others.

(Sorry, I’d normally put that in a slightly more cheerful way, but I’m just so tired.)

TIL some ants farm aphids.

Thank you, that helps.

or it’s some stupid power play thing where they think you’re trying to challenge their status.

Although if it’s that, I’ll never figure it out. I can’t even begin to relate to that enough to identify it.

And when are they appropriate or inappropriate?

This is my big problem. In a group where people are telling stories about themselves, when it’s my turn, my stories are inappropriate somehow. In 50+ years, I still haven’t figured out what I say that’s wrong,

I’ve spent ages analysing my stories compared to others and I can’t figure out the difference, and no one will tell me. Is it the content (seems comparable) or how I tell it?

It seems better to just say ‘pass’ in those situations and stop engaging.

Omg I want to print this out and staple it to my chest. I’ve been accused so many times of being a ‘one-upper’ when I’m just doing my best to relate to people.

I also need a label like sandpaper has – I’m like 60 grit abrasive.

Oh god, I’m doing it again, aren’t I?

Barkeeper’s Friend is a miracle, but people should know it’s incredibly abrasive and can debride enamelware. I ruined a pan’s outer finish because that didn’t occur to me, using it to get carbonisation off the bottom.

It’s brilliant for raw metal and glass cooktops, though. When I bought my house, the previous owners left a kit for the glass cooktop including the razor tool in your OP. I’m so grateful they did because I wouldn’t have known.

e: can’t spell

Uh, what? Have you owned a Mac in the last 30 years?

That’s not how it works. I’ve had two macs in the last 20 years, and more than a dozen Windows machines. I had to reformat the Windows PCs every year or so for various reasons until they became obsolete after like 5 years, but my macs have worked for 10 years each with no issues, and always upgraded to the latest OS easily and always for free. Both my macs lasted 10+ years of heavy use (my current one is 5+ years and still young).

Every time a Windows update came out it was an ordeal and I dreaded it; with each update I’d start looking at the cost of replacing the whole machine in case it bricks and it’s just not worth fixing things. Mac updates are barely a blip in my workflow.

Adobe projects that can’t be accessed on a workstation not running Monterrey or whatever

This makes zero sense. The Adobe suite runs much better on OSX than Windows by orders of magnitude, even on outdated and non-updated OS. There’s a reason most designers and professional VXers have always preferred Mac. (eta: also, rereading, this makes even less sense because Adobe projects don’t care about your OS when opening; just the version of Adobe itself. You can easily open projects made on a whole different OS: Windows/OSX, any recentish version with no problem. Even files made in CS6/OSX can be opened in the latest cloud app on Windows easily. You’re either mistaken here or being deliberately dishonest for some reason.)

I’ve been in IT/software development and VX design for a few decades and I’m really wondering how this is an ordeal for you. It makes no sense to me. My 3000 dollar laptop has outlasted 5 1000 dollar windows machines. You get what you pay for.

e: some words were cut

Also, in my few decades in the industry, the sales and marketing staff always ran Windows, but the design staff usually worked on Mac. That speaks for itself.

I just want to hug you all. Happy whichever holiday you’re celebrating right now. Loving all of you.