

Well, when someone is so obviously traumatized that they can’t stop ranting long enough to think, what options are there?
Once you’re past a certain point of trauma, it requires outside assistance to resolve, period. It isn’t something you can hand wave away, it isn’t something that changes as a fact even when the system is fucked.
But I’m telling you, the way you’re acting, you’re pushing right towards a major event. Might snap and cause harm to yourself or others, it might turn into a cardiovascular insult or a digestive one, there’s no telling. But it isn’t a matter of if, it’s a matter of when.
You’re so busy externalizing your pain, your fear, and your anger that it’s eating you up. You’ve devolved into monomaniacal rants; you do realize that’s not a good sign, right? People that are at that point in things, they don’t get better alone.
Do you have a local support network? Friends, family, even helpful members of your community? If not, would you like some help finding local resources? It varies a lot, but there are usually services on a county and/or city level. Wait times are absurd, and everyone is overloaded, but they do triage crises ahead of stable conditions. You’d be able to get started at least.
I’m still not sure if you’re serious, or maybe rage baiting, but I’ve walked the PTSD road. For decades. Once someone starts locking into a monomania like you are, it gets dangerous. The path out of that place is not easy, it’s not fast, but it is possible to find remission.
The venom you’re spitting? It isn’t really about what you think it is. Your mind is scrambling, trying to find something to hold onto, a way to escape the pain. A lot of people go through that. Unfortunately, it’s not long once it starts before you hit rock bottom with it.
So, if what you’re saying about your trauma is true, for your own health and safety, reach out and find a way to heal.
Beat me daddy! Beat me so hard!