I think the choice bit in the OP is key. Having someone swoop in to impose structure, no. Having someone help you create structure, yes, and that seems to be what OP is saying.
My point is that I fought that structure, tooth and nail. It took a long time for me to realise that I needed it. Choices help, but some rules need to be laid down, whether wanted or not.
I think the choice bit in the OP is key. Having someone swoop in to impose structure, no. Having someone help you create structure, yes, and that seems to be what OP is saying.
My point is that I fought that structure, tooth and nail. It took a long time for me to realise that I needed it. Choices help, but some rules need to be laid down, whether wanted or not.
So in your case the offered/imposed format of structure ended up working.
Yeah, plenty of AuDHD have some form of pathological demand avoidance, and the demand they accept presented structure will likely be rejected.
So the person you’re responding to isn’t wrong. Structure is necessary, but it needs to be one you can accept, either offered or self-imposed.