Even in the deepest suburbs it’s not that hard to form community and connection with your neighbors. Hold a few yard sales, make small talk, greet people walking their dogs, get to know who lives where. That’s literally all it takes, that and actually going out.
We complain endlessly, particularly on sites like Lemmy, about the US’s lack of “walkable cities” and other systemic obstacles to having better sense of community and social contact, but we hardly ever see people doing something about it.
I get that it’s less “fun” to go out and make friends if you don’t got a riverwalk and cafes, but the most important ingredient is still there, which is other people you just need to step up and make things happen.
Even in the deepest suburbs it’s not that hard to form community and connection with your neighbors.
I get that it’s less “fun” to go out and make friends if you don’t got a riverwalk and cafes, but the most important ingredient is still there, which is other people you just need to step up and make things happen.
There are so many angles to why isolated people don’t “just go out and talk to people”, though I will spare the rant as I live in an area likely much less densely populated than a suburb so I’m not sure how well my experience would map to what you’re saying.
Well, other than it’s a lot easier for some people than others due to many aspects (like the bit you mention about dogs will work better for someone who also has a dog) but those are already the sort of things that are the difference between someone with some sort of social life vs someone with none.
I’ve never heard of this as an arbitrary thing that just “happens.” Yes there are neighborhoods that are overly policed and have racial tensions, but if you’re in that kind of environment, you go out and stay with groups, you work within the system the best you can, you make planned events working with community organizers. It takes more planning and care, but even in those hostile urban environments, people go out and do things all the time. There is almost no place where you can’t just go out and walk somewhere, unless it’s such a dangerous area that a curfew is in effect. And really, if you live somewhere like that, you got bigger concerns.
There is a LOT of overhyped media about American neighborhoods, they hype it in both directions. Depending on what side of the political spectrum you connect with best, the algorithm will attempt to make you afraid of going out because you should be scared of police, or scared of the citizens.
In the vast majority of suburban neighborhoods and urban higher-density areas, there are always people walking around, walking their dogs, going to the convenience store, etc. The only time I’ve EVER been hassled by police was one time many years ago I was taking trash out in my own yard, but I was carrying a big black flashlight, carrying a trash bag and had a dark hoodie, and from a distance I looked just like a potential burglar. The cops asked me what I was up to, I said taking out the trash and they were kinda assholes but then left.
I’ve had people in cars shout at me as they pass by and I’ve had a cop drive up to me and ask me where I’m headed, dependes from location to location, but walking is just seen as an odd activity in this country for some reason lol
People in cars do sometimes shout nonsense as they pass pedestrians, but that’s just noise. Never respond to it, never think about it, never let it bother you. It’s the same as leaf-litter. You walk through it, you don’t let it even impact your stride. Purge from your memory as it happens like so much ballast.
Now for police, that can vary a LOT depending on where you live and what your skin color is, but there aren’t many places where people just can’t walk around for fear of police intervention, because at least in America, despite all the media horror and fear, there are millions and millions of people walking their dogs, walking to the store, picking up their kids at the bus stop, carrying groceries, exercising, and so on. The chances of having a serious encounter with law-enforcement isn’t zero, but it’s probably significantly lower than the chances of developing type-2 diabetes from not going out and exercising.
I have darker skin color so I avoid cops like the plague. I was walking home at 1 am in the rain and a single cop drove up to me and asked me where I was going and I wanted a lift, I picked a random apartment complex and said that’s my home and just pretended to go in there till he drove away
Even in the deepest suburbs it’s not that hard to form community and connection with your neighbors. Hold a few yard sales, make small talk, greet people walking their dogs, get to know who lives where. That’s literally all it takes, that and actually going out.
We complain endlessly, particularly on sites like Lemmy, about the US’s lack of “walkable cities” and other systemic obstacles to having better sense of community and social contact, but we hardly ever see people doing something about it.
I get that it’s less “fun” to go out and make friends if you don’t got a riverwalk and cafes, but the most important ingredient is still there, which is other people you just need to step up and make things happen.
There are so many angles to why isolated people don’t “just go out and talk to people”, though I will spare the rant as I live in an area likely much less densely populated than a suburb so I’m not sure how well my experience would map to what you’re saying.
Well, other than it’s a lot easier for some people than others due to many aspects (like the bit you mention about dogs will work better for someone who also has a dog) but those are already the sort of things that are the difference between someone with some sort of social life vs someone with none.
Don’t police stop people that are walking? I heard this from multiple people. It’s so unusual to not be in a car they investigate.
I’ve never heard of this as an arbitrary thing that just “happens.” Yes there are neighborhoods that are overly policed and have racial tensions, but if you’re in that kind of environment, you go out and stay with groups, you work within the system the best you can, you make planned events working with community organizers. It takes more planning and care, but even in those hostile urban environments, people go out and do things all the time. There is almost no place where you can’t just go out and walk somewhere, unless it’s such a dangerous area that a curfew is in effect. And really, if you live somewhere like that, you got bigger concerns.
There is a LOT of overhyped media about American neighborhoods, they hype it in both directions. Depending on what side of the political spectrum you connect with best, the algorithm will attempt to make you afraid of going out because you should be scared of police, or scared of the citizens.
In the vast majority of suburban neighborhoods and urban higher-density areas, there are always people walking around, walking their dogs, going to the convenience store, etc. The only time I’ve EVER been hassled by police was one time many years ago I was taking trash out in my own yard, but I was carrying a big black flashlight, carrying a trash bag and had a dark hoodie, and from a distance I looked just like a potential burglar. The cops asked me what I was up to, I said taking out the trash and they were kinda assholes but then left.
I’ve had people in cars shout at me as they pass by and I’ve had a cop drive up to me and ask me where I’m headed, dependes from location to location, but walking is just seen as an odd activity in this country for some reason lol
People in cars do sometimes shout nonsense as they pass pedestrians, but that’s just noise. Never respond to it, never think about it, never let it bother you. It’s the same as leaf-litter. You walk through it, you don’t let it even impact your stride. Purge from your memory as it happens like so much ballast.
Now for police, that can vary a LOT depending on where you live and what your skin color is, but there aren’t many places where people just can’t walk around for fear of police intervention, because at least in America, despite all the media horror and fear, there are millions and millions of people walking their dogs, walking to the store, picking up their kids at the bus stop, carrying groceries, exercising, and so on. The chances of having a serious encounter with law-enforcement isn’t zero, but it’s probably significantly lower than the chances of developing type-2 diabetes from not going out and exercising.
I have darker skin color so I avoid cops like the plague. I was walking home at 1 am in the rain and a single cop drove up to me and asked me where I was going and I wanted a lift, I picked a random apartment complex and said that’s my home and just pretended to go in there till he drove away
This kind of “societal pressure” for lack of a better term is probably discouraging people. At least for me it would be.